Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends on It — Literally
“Call a plant beautiful, and it becomes a flower. Call it ugly, and it becomes a weed.” — Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Get out of your head — Really?!
A world-renowned plastic surgeon by the name of Dr. Maxwell Maltz performed thousands of surgeries to improve the physical appearance of his patients; from those who have been burned to the badly scared due to an unfortunate incident.
After the surgery, many of his patients experienced tremendous personality transformations.
Others, however, felt no difference.
They felt the same about themselves even though the evidence of photographs revealed otherwise; they felt they looked the same.
This begs the question: Why did some patients see amazing improvements after their surgery, whereas others did not see the transformations that stood right in front of them?
Although Dr. Maltz’s surgeries were a success, many people did not see the success.
Even though their injuries or disfigurements have been ‘rectified,’ and they physically looked great, they did not see the change because their self image had not changed.
They changed from the outside, but the inside remained the same.
They felt ugly prior to the surgery and still thought of themselves as unappealing or unattractive after the surgery; even after major improvements have been made to their outer appearance.
It was at that point that Dr. Maltz recognised and understood the significance of a person’s self image.
In his classic book, PsychoCybernetics, he says self image is our ‘conception of the sort of person we are.’
Your self image defines and determines your level of happiness, the quality of your relationships, the state of your health, the standard of your lifestyle, your wealth and your success.
A healthy self image will have you achieve many a great thing in life; where you will enjoy and experience many successes. That’s why I strongly recommend you love yourself like your life depends on it.
Through a healthy self image, you will feel great about yourself
Some self image attributes are:
How you see your physical self
What sort of person you believe yourself to be
How you think others see you
How others see you
In his book, Power to Win, Dr. Walter Doyle Staples says, ‘Your self image is an integral part of your personality, and it is your idea of who and what you think you are. It is the private opinion you hold of yourself in light of your past successes and failures. The way you think about yourself is very much dependent on your ability to exercise personal power successfully in your life.’
Your self image is the idea that you hold of yourself.
How you feel about yourself is singularly the most important element that determines how much you like and enjoy your life. It is the blueprint that influences how you act and behave.
Your self image, how you feel about yourself, reveals how much success you will have in life.
Indicative signs of a weak and distorted self image:
Intimidated by eye-contact
Need to continually apologise
Fear of failing
Enjoying finding faults in other people
Don’t want to stand out
Feeling threatened by others who are better than they are
Bring others down to their level
Your self image is the key to success. It doesn’t matter how much success you achieve in life, the level of success that you enjoy will only ever grow to the degree that you hold your self image.
In other words, as you achieve success in your life, and you max out on your self image, as you reach to the full level of your current self image, your success level will begin to get left behind — your successes will come to an unexpected and sudden halt.
At that point you will have reached the ‘ceiling level’ of your self image, and you may find yourself slipping backwards to where you originally started from.
Your distorted self image kicked into full gear preventing you from any further success.
Your thoughts and actions may be what gets you to the point that you want to be at in your life, but, in the end, it is your self image that will keep you there.
For you to have and get pleasure from lasting success, you have to change the way that you see yourself. I have a long list of affirmations for self love that will help you increase your self image, and help you to really and truly love yourself like your life depends on it — because your life most definitely depends on how much you love yourself.
The more you love yourself, the more you will enjoy life.
All significant and lasting change stem from your self image.
You have to change the way that you see yourself. You have to see yourself from a different viewpoint.
“We tell lies when we are afraid… afraid of what we don’t know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie, the thing that we fear grows stronger.” - Williams Tad
How much do you value yourself?
Now that we have clarified what self image is and the way it ‘creates’ and directs you, there is also another aspect of the self that is very important, if not crucial, and that is self esteem.
Self esteem is the value that you put on yourself.
It forms the basis of your motivation, your assertiveness, and your personal empowerment. It gives you belief in yourself and in your capabilities.
It is especially powerful and necessary when other people have little faith in you and in your aptitude to achieve certain things; where their belief in you is less than the strong and high belief you may have of yourself.
Self esteem is a fundamental factor in achieving success
Your high self esteem allows you to continue to forge ahead despite any mistakes you may have made, despite any disappointments you may face, and its strength permits you to endure rejections and failures.
“Self esteem isn’t everything; it’s just that there’s nothing without it.” — Gloria Steinem
Your high self esteem gives you the indispensable courage to set aside other peoples’ lack of belief in you.
Your self esteem gets you started and keeps you going on the road to achievement regardless of what others think and believe, and it heaves you through any challenges and obstacles that you face.
When things get tough, your self esteem carries you forward
Having a high self esteem is extremely valuable; one which has the power to get you from where you are to where you want to be. Self esteem is the feeling of pride and dignity that you have of yourself.
It’s how much value you put on your self-worth. It’s a question of, do you see yourself as a person who is worthy or unworthy as a whole, or in certain areas of your life.
For instance, you could value yourself as a good salesperson or a great accountant, or you feel you are an unworthy as a whole person.
Self esteem is comprised of three components:
- Self-love: the ability for you to love and be kind to yourself.
- Self-acceptance: the ability for you to accept your strengths and weaknesses as key parts of your life.
- Self-worth: the ability for you to acknowledge how valuable you are.
Here are a couple of indications of poor self esteem:
A feeling of not being respected
Unable to make decisions
Being a perfectionist
In his book, The Purpose Driven Life, Rick Warren said, ‘The way you think determines the way you feel and the way you feel influences the way you act.’
“Nothing builds self esteem and self-confidence like accomplishment.” Thomas Carlyle
The prison you live in
Another reason for why you aren’t already successful could be because of your comfort zone. Neale Donald Walsh once said, ‘Life begins at the end of my comfort zone.’
Your comfort zone starts as a safe place for you to dwell in, but soon enough, it becomes a prison; a prison of the familiar, of the routine, of the habitual.
Any time you try something that is not familiar or that you are not accustomed to, you feel butterflies in your stomach, you feel knotted, scared, apprehensive and anxious.
When you feel such uncomfortable feelings, know that you are trying to step out of your comfort zone.
Unfortunately, for most people, rather than powering through the painful feelings of discomfort, rather than challenging and facing the unfamiliar, the unknown, they retreat back into the safety of their customary and proverbial comfort zone; the zone where no change or advancement takes place.
They remain within the stagnant familiarity of the known.
They don’t realise that each time they feel these invigorating feelings they are expanding their comfort zone to their betterment; not realising that all the rewards and successes lay at the outskirts of the self-made comfort zone.
The skills that are necessary for you to be more successful lie outside the boundaries of your comfort zone.
Your comfort zone is a reflection and home of your self image. It determines the precise degree of your success.
When you are snug and feeling cosy in your comfort zone, you will do what comes to you easily and naturally, and you will never grow.
Yet when you endeavour to step out of your prison of a comfort zone, and you push through the pain and discomfort, you will grow exponentially; you will enjoy more success, happiness and fulfilment.
High achievers and successful people regularly expand the boundaries of their comfort zone. What is crucial to them is the outcome, not the short-term and transient discomfort.
Regrettably, most of us prefer to play it safe and remain within the edge of our comfort zones; doing the same thing the same way every day.
Albert Einstein said, ‘Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but expecting different results.’ Remain within your comfort zone, doing the same things over and over will never bring about different results.
A great way to enrich the way you think about yourself and to improve your self image is to get out of your head and continually work at expanding your comfort zone.
You can get out of your head and use the powerful affirmations for self love below to literally start to love yourself completely and totally. Remember: Your aim is to love yourself like your life depends on it — it is a must.
Extending the boundaries of your comfort zone is one of the key ingredients to success and fulfilment
MY COMFORT ZONE — By Author Unknown
I used to have a comfort zone where I knew I wouldn’t fail.
The same four walls and busywork were really more like jail.
I longed so much to do the things I’d never done before,
But stayed inside my comfort zone and paced the same old floor.
I said it didn’t matter that I wasn’t doing much.
I said I didn’t care for things like commission checks and such.
I claimed to be so busy with the things inside the zone,
But deep inside I longed for something special of my own.
I couldn’t let my life go by just watching others win.
I held my breath; I stepped outside and let the change begin.
I took a step and with new strength I’d never felt before,
I kissed my comfort zone goodbye and closed and locked the door.
If you’re in a comfort zone, afraid to venture out,
Remember that all winners were at one time filled with doubt.
A step or two and words of praise can make your dreams come true.
Reach for your future with a smile; success is there for you!
Courtesy of: http://www.pure-inspirational-thoughts.com/
Jack Canfield says: ‘Think of your comfort zone as a prison you live in — a largely self-created prison. It consists of the collection of cant’s, musts, must nots.’
As promised, here are many affirmations for self love to dramatically improve your life:
I choose to accept love from myself
I choose to be at peace with myself
I choose to create my own love
I choose to forgive myself
I choose to be at peace with my past
I choose to be proud of who I am becoming
I choose to do the best I can
I choose to learn to love myself more every day
I choose to be open to see myself in a new light
I choose to let go of my past beliefs that no longer serve me
I choose to deserve love
I choose to be worthy of love
I choose to be a radiant and joyous person
I choose to be successful
I choose to live a life that is filled with love
I choose to allow happiness to flow freely from me
I choose to be confident
I choose to walk with grace
I choose to love and treasure my body
I choose to deserve love
What would it take for me to become more worthy of love, peace, and joy?
What would it take for me to become more than enough?
What would it take for me to have a warm and caring heart?
What would it take for me to become filled with love for who I am?
What would it take for me to become love incarnated?
What would it take for me to let go and move forward?
What would it take for me to let go of the past?
What would it take for me to grow wiser each day?
What would it take for me to commit to get out of my head and get into the world?
What would it take for me to become worthy of love, flaws and all?
What would it take for me to accept all of me with love?
What would it take for me to be happy?
What would it take for me to believe in myself?
What would it take for me to treat myself with the kindness of a friend?
What would it take for me to become beautifully unique?
What would it take for me to love who I am?
What would it take for me to be not afraid of my feelings?
What would it take for me to be right where I need to be?
What would it take for me to shine like a diamond?
What would it take for me to stop apologising for being me?
What would it take for me to trust myself?
What if I can feel all self-hatred melting away?
What if I can let go of self-judgment and self-criticism?
What if I am a gift to the world?
What if I can deal with whatever comes my way?
What if I can say goodbye to self-pity?
What if I can shower myself with compassion?
What if I can cherish my relationship with myself?
What if I can embrace positive thoughts?
What if I can love my body for all that it does for me?
What if I can be at peace with my appearance?
For these affirmations for self love to be more effective, I recommend you record the ones you like onto your Smartphone and play them as you go to sleep. The volume doesn’t have to be loud; just at the level where you can barely hear them. Your subconscious mind will hear them even at a low volume.
Leave a gap of a couple of seconds in between each affirmation. Listen to these affirmations for self love as long as you wish, but I recommend the minimum to be 60 days. Then listen to them one or twice a week for maintenance.
This way you get out of your head and get into a clean slate of thought. You get into a new head: new empowering self loving thoughts and beliefs.
This is where the magic happens. When you love yourself like your life depends on it, you’ll be amazed at how wonderful your life can be.
If you really want to love life, enjoy life, you can find it when you get out of your head that is dictating life for you and get into one that is filled with love for yourself.
You see, you have been trained to un-love yourself.
For you to truly love yourself unconditionally, it is vital that you look beyond the simple quick fixes that are plaguing television and magazines; such as diets that will make you a better you, or the latest pill and you will be a new you.
The only way to “uncreate” that distorted self image and have it replaced with a lovely lovable high self image is through your mind and your heart.
Love yourself as you want to be loved.
Love yourself as you want to love someone!
Just be you!
Again, I have to say this, love yourself like your life depends on it, because it does!!
Wake up every morning and hug yourself.
Wake up every morning and take care of yourself.
Wake up every morning and look into the mirror, and smile a big smile.
You may repeat one or a few of the affirmations for self love if you choose to.
As life throws its curve balls at you, you will now be able to get out of your head that you lived in before now, and you will live life from a different perspective.
You will be living it from a clear, fresh, and positive perspective.
Nothing will stand in your way. Life may give you a run for your money, but you will override all of it with your smiles and love for yourself.
To finally have the gift of a high self image, a high self esteem will bring you a deep awareness of who you are. A new respect for you.
A genuine love for yourself and the confidence to soar!
Finding your self image and self esteem saves your world. Enjoy it. Embrace it. Love it.
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Hani A Al-Qasem is a personal development educator who specialises in the life and success mindset.
Having devoted over 16 years to the study of human potential and personal development, he is committed to inspire, support and motivate people to create a better and more optimistic world for us all to live in.
Hani A Al-Qasem believes that together, as human beings with a conscience, we can share our expertise, our strengths, our passion, our gift to create awareness that there is another way to make things happen. Instead of ‘changing the TV channel’ because we can’t bear to watch the harshness of life around us, we can take combined action to transform lives.
We cannot change the circumstances that brought people to where they are, but we can change their thinking, from within, to improve the quality of their present and future lives.
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